Evolving Through The Practice of Shadow Work

The first rule of shadow work is that we lie to ourselves first. 

You experience this lie through narrative transportation, cognitive fusion, and varying degrees of experiential avoidance. These concepts offer insights into understanding and transforming our inner selves, ultimately awakening us from the dream we didn't know we were having. The value of shadow work is in the profound exploration of human consciousness and personal growth. You pull at your blueprint of reality that gives you the cognitive flexibility to develop new insights, breakthrough resistance, and heal wounds that have had you caught in dreams and nightmares you forgot you were having.

Let's talk about Narrative Transportation.

A concept rooted in psychology and storytelling. It describes the phenomenon where individuals become deeply engrossed in a narrative, temporarily losing awareness of their surroundings and personal identity. How do you know a book, story, movie, or tale is good? You can tell by how swept up in the story you get. In this state, you can be profoundly affected by the story, experiencing emotions and adopting perspectives as if you were part of the narrative. Narrative transportation can inspire, enlighten, and transform us by allowing us to empathize with characters and situations beyond our own lives. Uncle Tom’s Cabin greatly furthered the abolitionist cause in the North, ratcheted up tensions with southern slaveholders, and, as President Lincoln himself suggested, helped tip the country into civil war. How? Because of narrative transportation. 

Your mind is coded through stories, symbols, and patterns. The pattern the mind anticipates and is wired for is story. Joseph Campbell stunned the world when he uncovered that every mythology and religion had embedded in it the same code, the monomyth. This makes perfect sense when we tie our current understanding of the holographic nature of reality and the first Hermetic Principle that all is mind. You are living out your own personal mythology. The challenge for most of us is that we have lost the plot. You are living out the extraordinary story of your life. Myth is just a reflection of life.

Mythology is the telling of lies to uncover a more profound truth. We tell ourselves stories or scenarios over and over. This fits perfectly in a holographic universe that is looking back on itself. Look at your day and notice how many stories you tell yourself. Now, notice how much narrative transportation is at play in the subjective experience of the story called you. Now, consider that is just how much you are aware of. What if narrative transportation ran deeper than you thought? Notice how, in your mind, your life is a story. What is the storyline you have been living out of? This is your personal mythology. The river of the story called you. What happens when we make meaning so painful that our ego refuses to experience the pain from the story that we have made up? 

The senses gather some 11 million bits per second from the environment. But our conscious minds can handle only 40 to 50 bits of information a second. Your mind constantly decides what information you should be aware of, how it should be presented, and which “facts” should be the most important. That stuff is offered up based on constructs you created through life. Because you are living out your own personal myth, you are the hero of your subjective experience. Anything too painful or that upsets the applecart of all the meaning you live out of gets avoided or flat-out denied. However, while avoidance may provide temporary relief, it often perpetuates a cycle of suffering in the long run. Avoiding challenging experiences denies us the opportunity to learn and grow.

Avoiding experiences

Experiential avoidance is trying to avoid or escape unpleasant thoughts, emotions, and experiences. It is an automatic mental process meant to protect us from discomfort. Too much pain equals death. The mind has been hijacked for survival. Experiential avoidance is one of your mind’s basic subroutines: avoid any discomfort. The greater the hurt, the harder your mind works to prevent it.  

Lost in Thought

Cognitive fusion, closely related to experiential avoidance, occurs when we become overly attached to our thoughts and emotions, believing them to be absolute truths. It's like being so caught up in your own story that you can't see beyond it. Like inner narrative transportation, we fuse with our internal narratives, allowing them to dictate our actions and shape our perception of reality. These fusions limit our ability to step back and observe our thoughts objectively. Instead, we become entangled in a web of self-created stories, which can lead to distorted thinking patterns and emotional distress. Overcoming cognitive fusion is a key part of personal growth and self-awareness.

The practice of shadow work is usually engaged by exploring and integrating the hidden and often suppressed aspects of our psyche, known as the shadow. The shadow represents the parts of yourself you disown, repress, or find uncomfortable acknowledging. Shadow is the unseen connection between people, places, things, and events. Engaging in shadow work requires a willingness to confront your fears, insecurities, and undesirable traits to embrace the totality of your being. It's a journey of self-reflection, where you uncover genius and unlock insights hidden in a system of pain and false structure. By shining the light of awareness on your shadow, you gain self-awareness, self-acceptance, and the ability to transcend the limitations that hold you back. You begin to cultivate your unique expression of self. Genius emerges.

The Practice of Shadow Work

The transformative potential of shadow work is immense. By delving into the depths of our unconscious, we uncover buried emotions, unresolved trauma and drama, and unexpressed desires. This process enables us to heal and integrate these aspects, creating a greater sense of wholeness and authenticity. Shadow work allows us to break free from societal conditioning, release self-limiting beliefs, and cultivate a more genuine connection with ourselves and others. This journey of self-discovery is not always easy, but the rewards are profound and inspiring.

Shadow work can help awaken us from the dream we didn't know we were having. Experiential avoidance and cognitive fusion keep us trapped in patterns of avoidance and identification with our thoughts and emotions. We dismantle these patterns by recognizing our shadows and developing shadow work and integration practices. We can approach discomfort with curiosity and compassion rather than avoidance. We become more aware of our cognitive fusions and can loosen their grip on our lives. As a result, we step out of the dream-like state created by our avoidance and fusion and awaken to a deeper understanding of ourselves and the world around us. By embracing discomfort, observing our thoughts and emotions with detachment, and exploring the depths of our shadow, we transcend the dream we didn't know we were having. This process allows us to reclaim our agency, connect with our authentic selves, and cultivate a more prosperous, meaningful existence.

Here are some prompts to engage and integrate the insights from this blog:

1. Reflect on your personal mythology: Take a moment to consider the narrative you’ve been living out. What is the story you tell yourself about your life? Is it a heroic journey, a struggle, or something else? How does this storyline shape your daily experiences?
2. Observe your narrative transportation: Think about a recent story from a book, movie, or conversation that deeply engrossed you. How did that narrative affect your emotions and thoughts? Can you see any connections between that story and your own life experiences?
3. Challenge your constructs: Identify a limiting belief or construct you’ve held for a long time. Ask yourself: What story is supporting this belief? How does this construct influence your actions or reactions? Can you imagine rewriting this story in a way that empowers you?
4. Examine experiential avoidance: Reflect on a moment when you avoided an uncomfortable emotion or situation. What did you do to escape it? How might engaging with that discomfort have offered you an opportunity for growth or healing?
5. Loosen cognitive fusion: Identify a thought or emotion that has been particularly consuming for you recently. How tightly are you holding onto it? Try to observe this thought from a distance, as an outside observer. Does it feel as absolute as it once did?
6. Uncover your shadow: What are the aspects of yourself that you often avoid or deny? Spend time sitting with these parts of your psyche. How might accepting these hidden aspects of yourself unlock new insights or creativity?
7. Explore your patterns: Take a moment to notice the stories you tell yourself daily. Do they often revolve around the same themes or beliefs? What patterns can you observe in these narratives? How might they be shaping your experience of reality?
8. Confront your discomfort: The next time you feel discomfort, pause and notice your mind’s instinct to avoid it. Instead of pushing it away, invite curiosity into the situation. What is this discomfort teaching you about yourself? Can you sit with it and discover something new?
9. Embrace the shadow in relationships: Think about a relationship or interaction that recently triggered you. What aspect of yourself might this situation be reflecting? How can you use this moment as an opportunity for growth and integration?